Sharp claws

I don't particularly like cats.

They're terrifying.  One minute they're all like purr purr purr I love you and the next they are hissing and scratching you just for doing something like breathing.  Cats are utterly unpredictable and judgemental.  Dogs do also judge you and have random acts of spontaneity - but ultimately you're on a more even footing with a dog.

There's always that stereotype that dogs are boys and cats are girls.  As a dog owner to a lovely female dog, I always denied this - but as of today I have finally come to agree.

You find a mouse in your house.  Deep down you want to get a hamster cage and adopt it - but you know that's ultimately not the most sensible thing to do - so you take it outside.  A couple of hours later when you're otherwise occupied, your cat comes in with the remains of this little mouse in its mouth with the triumphant 'Look what I did' expression.  Apparently cat owners have to praise them for doing this rather than shrieking how disgusting it is.  When the cat stops playing with it, you take the remains of your former furry companion outside again with a prayer for it to rest in peace.

But a few hours later the cat brings it back in.  It lays the remains at your feet so you are forced to acknowledge it - even though you don't want to.

Annoyingly, this can continue for a really long time - to the point where all you see is the skull of this little mouse and you can scarcely remember how cute it was in life.

So the point of this blog?  Dog owners spend their time teaching dogs to pick something up and then going 'Drop, drop. DROP,' in varying degrees of threat.  It's a skill we should be teaching cats.  To stop dragging things back into your life in various stages of unpleasantness.

Cast List:

Cat Owner - Me
Mouse - A relationship I had that I'd like to tuck away and only look back on occasionally with fondness.
Cats - Girls

So I'm nailing the cat flap shut.  I'm not against all cats.  Some are genuinely lovely and I want them in my life - but I'm going to need cats to stop being so two faced.  Particularly now.